(no subject)
Jun. 7th, 2011 02:45 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
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Title: The Better Part of Valor
Rating: G
Genre: Introspection, gen
Word Count: 299
Characters: Victoria, mentions of Two and Jamie
Warnings: Spoilers for Evil of the Daleks and Fury from the Deep.
Summary: The problem with nights is you're alone with just yourself and the past.
-
Lately, Victoria Waterfield is afraid of the dark.
And it isn’t just that every creak of the old house or rustle of leaves makes her think of cybermats or long, noxious tendrils reaching from the abyss in the sea, though she’d been quite happily ignorant of those horrors before she met the Doctor.
It’s that after the bustle of the day has died down, the weight of everything she’s lost weighs on her. Her father. Her home. She tries to keep her chin up and not show weakness, but when she’s alone the façade drops.
She misses the Doctor and Jamie, too, and she fears for them. There were days when, if it hadn’t been for her, they would have met an awful fate. And maybe, despite all the bravery she’s shown, they think her a coward for leaving. That’s almost unbearable, because she knows how much they value courage. But she lets them think less of her, because her real fear is too terrible to be voiced. She’d been afraid that one day she wouldn’t be enough, and the Doctor’s luck would run out.
Victoria had known that day was coming. It comes for all brave fools. She just doesn’t want to see it. She doesn’t want to think of the day the Doctor and Jamie are parted by the only thing strong enough to part them, or imagine that kindly old face in pain. She doesn’t want to picture the TARDIS collecting moss the day no one comes back.
But every night, there those images are, along with the ones of her father killed by Daleks, her house burning, all the pain and loss she’s seen in her travels. She left all that, deliberately, for a new and peaceful life. She’d thought that leaving would be enough.
Rating: G
Genre: Introspection, gen
Word Count: 299
Characters: Victoria, mentions of Two and Jamie
Warnings: Spoilers for Evil of the Daleks and Fury from the Deep.
Summary: The problem with nights is you're alone with just yourself and the past.
-
Lately, Victoria Waterfield is afraid of the dark.
And it isn’t just that every creak of the old house or rustle of leaves makes her think of cybermats or long, noxious tendrils reaching from the abyss in the sea, though she’d been quite happily ignorant of those horrors before she met the Doctor.
It’s that after the bustle of the day has died down, the weight of everything she’s lost weighs on her. Her father. Her home. She tries to keep her chin up and not show weakness, but when she’s alone the façade drops.
She misses the Doctor and Jamie, too, and she fears for them. There were days when, if it hadn’t been for her, they would have met an awful fate. And maybe, despite all the bravery she’s shown, they think her a coward for leaving. That’s almost unbearable, because she knows how much they value courage. But she lets them think less of her, because her real fear is too terrible to be voiced. She’d been afraid that one day she wouldn’t be enough, and the Doctor’s luck would run out.
Victoria had known that day was coming. It comes for all brave fools. She just doesn’t want to see it. She doesn’t want to think of the day the Doctor and Jamie are parted by the only thing strong enough to part them, or imagine that kindly old face in pain. She doesn’t want to picture the TARDIS collecting moss the day no one comes back.
But every night, there those images are, along with the ones of her father killed by Daleks, her house burning, all the pain and loss she’s seen in her travels. She left all that, deliberately, for a new and peaceful life. She’d thought that leaving would be enough.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-06-16 10:37 pm (UTC)I shipped them both with the Doctor, though.I do get what you mean about fandom being, well, fangirly, and I know that 90% of it is crap, as per Sturgeon's Law, but I kind of....object to that, nonetheless, because women's writing is often ghettoized and dismissed for being women's writing. Even when the writing of some women is legitimized, it's because she beat men at their own game, not because her own game was in any way legitimate. What I love so much about fandom is that it is pretty much female-dominated, and is a female culture. Even when I shake my head at how utterly shitty a lot of fanfiction is, I kind of love it, too, because it's shitty in a very feminine way, and it isn't being stigmatized for that, it's being celebrated, the way we've celebrated masculine shite for god knows how long.
So when I see women's fiction, fanfiction, being dismissed or mocked for the unlikely romances, or the Mary Sues, or the whump, or the hurt/comfort, or the rape fantasies, or god forbid, even mpreg, I feel defensive of it. (I am also a fine purveyor of whump and unlikely romances myself.)
I have noticed that classic fandom is more male, because you have all the old school fanboys that were watching when Tom Baker was on the air, and didn't need a nice female audience avatar like Rose to ease their way in. (Thank you, Rose! :D) So I can understand why dudes would be more comfortable there, and I'm not judging. It's actually a bit of a surprise to me, as I go further into classic fandom, how in some places I'm pretty much the only girl, and I wonder how they see me and my revisionist headcanon and my profound love for Doctor/Master in any form.
I certainly look forward to more Doctor Who! Sarah Jaaane. ;____; I watched all of The Sarah Jane Adventures, so I am quite attached to her character despite not seeing her original run yet. This is gonna break my heart even more.